third culture kids

Our 4 precious kiddos.

If we didn't have any kids, this whole missions thing would be sooo much easier!  Like, a thousand times easier!  While we are super excited to have our kids involved in such an amazing ministry, and we are also glad that our kids will be growing up with such a great perspective on life, I do wonder often how it will affect them.  In good ways and bad ways.  I know there will be many advantages for them, such as:

-a global perspective
-they will most likely see God working in some very tangible ways in our lives
-they will be bi-lingual
-they will hopefully grow up with a burden for the lost--especially (hopefully) seeing firsthand the effects of a spirtually lost people group coming to Christ!
-hopefully the chance to help us with teaching and discipling an unreached people group! 
-lots of knowledge of the world, missions, etc that most of their peers won't really have.

And I'm sure there will be many more advantages.

However, today in Nathan's married men's chapel, a man from New Tribes (who headed up an NTM department dedicated to missionary kids) came to talk.  It is such a hugely important topic that NTM has now integrated it as part of the missionary training, which is so good to hear. That means that in our next phase of training, Nathan and I will be taking a full 15 credit hours on this subject!  But he talked to Nathan and the guys today about "Third Culture Kids."  This is a topic that I wanted to blog about, for 2 reasons:  First, because these thoughts are so fresh in my mind and I don't want to forget them--so this is a good place to record them:).  And also, because we think it is so important for us to be real and open with our family and friends about these real-life issues.  So here are a couple of things that he talked about today:

-A missionary kid is a "Third Culture Kid."  This means that our kids will not truly be a part of the American culture.  They are also not truly a part of the culture of the country we are serving in (they may speak the language and get along well with the people, but they are not truly a part of the culture.  They will think differently than the people in that country and have a different worldview).  This results in this"third culture" which is somewhat of a mixture of both cultures.  The missionary kid could have trouble ever feeling "at home" anywhere...in the world.  (I think since we are aware of this and we will be trained in this area, there will be potential for our kids not to struggle with this.  But it is a reality with many missionary kids).

-While we (as parents) will be so excited to come "home" for our furloughs, to our kids it may actually seem kind of scary to come to this big place called America.  (For Kaine and Halle, this may not be as much as an issue, since they will have lived in America for quite a few years of their childhood by the time we go overseas). 

-It is so vitally important for our kids to have some people in America who they feel comfortable with.  Of course, their grandparents will have a HUGE part in this!  But for example, when we come home on furlough, we will walk into our "home church" and be so excited to see everyone!  But to some extent, our kids won't know people there.  So it is hugely important to have some core people whom they feel comfortable with. 
 * a note on this...yesterday Kaine (and I!) was so blessed by his sweet friends Carter and Hudson.  Carter and Hudson are Kaine's best friends back home and together they sometimes call themselves the "Three Amigos"...so cute!  But anyway, yesterday, Carter and Hudson were playing together at Carter's house and they had the idea to skype with Kaine.  I was so glad they thought of that, and I think these 2 are going to be KEY relationships in Kaine's life (hope you are okay with that, Jess and Amy!!).  Anyway, Jess, thanks so much for setting that up!  It really meant a lot:)

-for the grandparents:  The guy talked to Nathan's group today about the IMPORTANT role of grandparents.  He said it will help our kids so much as they transition back to the States someday if they have close relationships with their grandparents (which we are so thankful that they already do!  Our kids have some very amazing grandparents, so this doesn't seem like it would be an issue).  However, one thing I thought made a lot of sense was how important it is for the grandparents to come and visit us on the field (in whatever country we end up in).  In that way, they have a MUCH closer connection to their grandkids, as they will have "entered into their world".  They will know what their grandkids' home is like--they will have seen it, experienced it, etc.  This is huge in helping the missionary kids out.  And again, I am sure our parents are already planning to visit someday! 


I am so glad that New Tribes trains their missionaries in this area.  They have years of experience, and they have come to know that this topic of missionary kids is just huge.  So we are very thankful that we will be receiving lots more training on this subject!

I know this is more than I usually write, and a bit more personal...but like I said, we just think it is important to be real about stuff.  We appreciate each one of you who is involved in our lives and our kids' lives!  God bless your week!